Life Ever After: A Trilogy
by Kiasohma
Summary: All that I'm after is a life full of laughter...As long as I'm laughing with you...The FUTURE, the PAST, and the PRESENT of Grimmjow & Ichigo, GRIMMICHI R&R "Because there's no life after you"
1. The FUTURE

A/N: I guess you can call this the winning poll, but honestly it was also after listening to this song and gaining my muse back. This is the GrimmIchi Trilogy that I was going to write for you guys. It's not quite what I expected. Seemed spontaneous. And Grimmjow might seem OC, but you'll know why. Oh, and recommend listening to this song, "Life After You" by Daughtry. It's what inspired this fic, so I hope you enjoy it :D

* * *

_**Life Ever After [A Trilogy] – The Future**_

_**

* * *

**_

_All that I'm after is a life full of laughter, _

_ As long as I'm laughing with you,_

_ I'm thinkin' that all that still matters is love ever after_

_After the life we've been through_

_'Cause I know there's no life after you_

* * *

Grimmjow tried very hard to forget the war.

It was over, wasn't it? He shouldn't cry over spilled milk or some bullshit like that. Though he wasn't exactly crying, Urahara kept bringing it up every time he had to visit the shop for Gigai check up. He had no choice in the matter. Still, something was bothering him. And the ex-shinigami seemed to pick up on it, even though Grimmjow himself wasn't quite sure yet what the problem was.

Maybe it was the change. He was never fond of the idea. But everything ended after Aizen was defeated, if anyone could even call it that.

It was so anticlimactic Grimmjow would have bet his beloved sword on it that everything was ripped out of a fucking storybook and shoved into his face just for laughs. But his sword just wasn't his most importance piece of belongings anymore. Without blood to feed Pantera, the blade was like a scrap of metal. He was still a proud owner of that scrap of metal, but that was beside the point.

It was too easy. All of it.

Honestly, he thought, Aizen wasn't meant to die. As much as he disliked his deceased leader, he respected his skills, his powers. For him to die because of foolish self-pride was unacceptable.

And Soul Society wasn't supposed to win. Hell, Ulquiorra—that prick—wasalso fated to die. But things didn't turn out the way he liked them to be, did they?

And he…Grimmjow…wasn't supposed to be alive.

But here he was, standing, kicking, still fighting everyday, albeit with a different purpose in his non-living life.

All due to one person, one human, one shinigami.

_The_ One.

"Hey, Grimm. You okay?"

Grimmjow snapped up from his musing, hands still tightly placed on top of the glass table, flat and tensed. He looked up. "Hmm?"

Kurosaki was shock from his reaction.

"Whoah, did you seriously just responded normally?" Ichigo chuckled, nearly incredulous. "Without the scowl and all, you know. That's a nice change."

"Change," Grimmjow repeated; then scoffed darkly. "What change? You're getting cheeky, Kurosaki."

Ichigo merely smiled at his weak retort, and Grimmjow grumbled and look out the store's window, watching the humans scurrying along the sidewalk, still thinking how insignificant their path of life truly was, even if he had gained a certain level of respect for them in these past years.

"Still stubborn…" Ichigo muttered before sipping on a shake, his other hand busy scribbling something onto a piece of paper, all actions on auto-pilot. Grimmjow didn't get the point of it even after watching the man work every day, either scrunched up in front of his desk or in a café like the one they were at now. So focused, so determined, Ichigo wrote and read so much now that Grimmjow was caught up with the man's motivation as well.

"What about you?" the ex-Espada muttered—because that's everybody seemed to be these days, "Ex-this-and-that,"—and picked up a book to look at. Though not as clueless as before, cultural studies was still something that made Grimmjow twitch whenever Ichigo brought it up. "_You_ changed."

"No, I didn't," Ichigo rebutted.

"Yea, ya did," Grimmjow said, frowning back. "What's with this? Studying? College? You should be fighting." He made a face. "The years have made you dull."

To Grimmjow's surprise, Ichigo laughed. He should be offended, but he only waited for the man to calm down and regain his bearings, waiting for an explanation for this idiotic outburst.

"Oh yeah?" Ichigo practically chirped. "Just so you know, growing up doesn't equate change." The man smiled. "It's just how people are. And you? Why did you stop fighting? Before, you would have bugged me to spar everyday."

Grimmjow turned. "I got bored."

With a raised eyebrow, Ichigo opened his mouth to comment on Grimmjow's unusual behavior, but quickly closed it. He brought a finger up to tap on his chin, reconsidering his words.

"And College?" Ichigo questioned.

Grimmjow shrugged. "You do it," he said. "I don't see why I shouldn't."

It was honestly shocking. "Wow…just…wow."

Even now, Ichigo couldn't fully grasp the idea of Grimmjow entering a university with him. Everybody was worried days and nights at this turn of events that Ichigo had to reassure them more than once that there weren't going to be sudden, mysterious disappearances, nor would there be freak accidents happening around the campus. The only things brewing around were rumors about Grimmjow's weird heritage. It was oddly amusing that even Ishida let down his guard. So they dropped the case and let bygones be bygones.

"So, 3 years, huh?" Ichigo pursed his lips, and Grimmjow watched him push up a thin-rimmed glasses. Kurosaki didn't peg him as someone whose eyesight needed aid. The man was probably wearing it to hide something much deeper, heavier. Ichigo said it made him focus more on his work, since he didn't like doing it. Grimmjow snorted at him for such a superficial conduct.

After a moment or two, and a pause in the sound of pencil on paper, Grimmjow spoke up, tapping the table a bit to gain Ichigo's full attention.

"Kurosaki," he began, somewhat unsure. He chastised himself for the hesitation he was bearing, but moved on. He was Grimmjow Jaegarjaques. He would only allow that kind of shilly-shallying to happen once, no matter how much time had passed.

"I don't like it," said Grimmjow. His lips twisted into a grimace. "I should be killing someone right about now, or even myself out of sheer boredom. This is too typical for me. But that's not the problem.

"I'm not fighting this as much as I should. I don't want to be caught up in this normality," he muttered.

Ichigo straightened up from his slanted position, dropping his pencil.

"Terrifying, isn't it?" he said, understanding, as if to save the blue-haired man his pride.

Grimmjow didn't make any move to agree.

"But I know this," Grimmjow settled for continuing on like he was never stopped, his fingers trailing along the coffee cap in front of him, brooding. "I like my stay here. Not at first, of course not." A scoff. "But I do. I never thought I can live a life without battles, wars, blood, fighting and survival, all those shit. I really, _really_ would have killed myself already if that wasn't a dumb and cowardly move on my part.

"I guess," Grimmjow licked his lips, "I just decided to tolerate it, even if just a little. But you grew on me. I still don't like it. But my goals had changed." He looked up with a fierce glow in his eyes. "I blame you for this, _Ichigo_."

"You are so open, Grimmjow Jaegarjaques," Ichigo mused with a pleased nod, pissing the other man off purposefully by his obvious actions. "And I am flattered."

"I'm not complimenting you," Grimmjow growled.

"Well, this relationship—how do I say it?—as fucked up as it is, it's eerily satisfying," said Ichigo, eliciting an immediate scoff from Grimmjow. The latter picked up his drink and down it like one would with alcohol. It was coffee, though, and Grimmjow was left with an aftertaste that he didn't quite like or dislike. He made a face at the bitter grains that were left at the bottom of the cup.

"Please, if any relationship has the word "eerie" in it, it's the pale, emo fuckwit that's hooked up with that woman."

Ichigo chuckled. His notes had been long tucked inside his books and notebooks, pen and pencils put away neatly once the conversation had started. Talking with Grimmjow had always been more amusing, perhaps not as productive, but sometimes much, _much_ more interesting.

"Mmm, and remember, some time ago, we would have never even consider this scenario happening," Ichigo muttered.

"Scenario?"

"Me, you, this shop…" Ichigo gave a shrug. "Laughing, talking, no bickering—well, occasionally…yeah, there was no way this could have been true a couple of years ago."

"Shinigami, I thought I was the pessimistic one," Grimmjow finally let out a chuckle. His voice was filled with a hidden contentment that Ichigo never seem to miss, but also never mention about. The orange-haired man only took what was given with a smile that was no longer as rare as before.

"Well, you wouldn't have been the one making jokes like this if I was still a shinigami," Ichigo said.

A corner of Grimmjow's lips lifted up in that strange way Ichigo knew he would do whenever he felt the urge to truly smile but struggled to form a grimace instead, trying to cancel the action out like a node with an anti-node.

He couldn't help but think back about the notebook he stumbled upon in Orihime's room a month or two ago when he was helping the girl clean out her room for college. Ulquiorra was there. To tell the truth, Ichigo was wary at his presence. But the man was just lounging there, unbothered, so Ichigo moved on.

Ichigo had made a little correction to the words with the bubbly girl by his side, encouraging. It was a small modification that changed everything.

He stood up with Grimmjow following not soon after, paying the bill, leaving together. Grimmjow was stiff, but was much comfortable, like a cat that had finally found a place to take the perfect nap.

And Ichigo dumped his books on him to carry with glee as the man grumbled and attempted to throw them right back.

_Hello, Halcyon day_s, indeed.

* * *

A/N: College is looming, which is probably why it's going to be a recurring theme in this story...well, not a lot, just something that would bear the sense of normalcy that Grimmjow was talking about. So, yeah...there's two more parts in this, as all trilogy has, so look forward to it. Bother me a lot by R&R too so I can update faster cus it seems to be a problem these days T^T


	2. The PAST

_**Life After You [A Trilogy] – The Past**_

* * *

_Last time we talked, the night that I walked_

_Burns like an iron in the back of my mind_

_I must've been high to say you and I_

_Weren't meant to be and just wasting my time_

_Oh, why did I ever doubt you?_

_You know I would die here without you…_

* * *

Grimmjow liked watching Ichigo sleeps. The peaceful face of the teen somehow relaxed him, made him forget all the troubles, took him away from all the violence that he thought he loved, the violence that was supposed to be a part of him but it was not entirely true at all.

He never thought he would be able to meet Ichigo like this day after day. If it weren't due to the fact that soul society had been able to deal a major blow to Aizen's army, enough that it had put the haughty overlord in a position that had him rethinking his plans—who would have thought it could happen—Grimmjow wouldn't be able to roam the real world freely like this, Tosen and Ulquiorra, aka his watchdogs, too busy with their increased responsibilities to pay him any mind.

Although it should have pissed Grimmjow off that he was deemed too unreliable to actually be placed with any important duties, Grimmjow was far from angry. In fact, he thought it was the stupidest, yet favorable, thing Aizen or anybody could ever do for him. He now had free time. And as long as he wasn't causing any ostentatious uproar or loud disturbances that would stick him under the radar of Las Noches or Soul Society, Grimmjow was left alone to do whatever he pleased.

It had got to be the most satisfying feeling any person could have.

"Grimmjow?"

The sexta snapped his head forward at the call, his musing disappearing quickly at the sight of Ichigo grumpily blinking sleep from his eyes and looking at him with a disapproving frown.

"Shinigami," he returned the call, a slight nod to his head. Then a smirk.

And this was how they greet each other when they couldn't do so with their fists, with curt acknowledgements and short "What the fuck are you doing here?" and "Get out of my room" from the teen's part.

Even though it was so normal for them, to talk when they couldn't fight, to find enjoyment in the close proximity of each other's presence, Grimmjow was initially surprised that he was fine with the situation as it was. He didn't hope for more and he didn't regret their meetings. What came as a shock to him was the fact that he found his pride oddly intact, without even a hurtful scratch on the ball of ego or his arrogant ways, even when he was taking comfort in their encounters.

These things were supposed to make him seem weak, to render him into a harmless "house cat," a term that Ichigo liked to use as an insult whenever he got annoyed at him, a term that Grimmjow hated but also found endearing coming from the teen and coming from the teen alone. If anyone else were to come that close to offending him with stupid nicknames like that, well, he'd have one for them too, and it'd be "Six-feet-under."

Ha. _Six_.

He had taken a liking to that human expression. It basically had "Owned by Grimmjow Jaegarjaqeus" written all over it.

"What do you want?" Ichigo's tone was snappish. Grimmjow sneered at the teen but assumed that last night's hollow attacks probably took a lot of energy out from Ichigo. He would know. He was there, but more as a spectator than anything, even as Ichigo was yelling at him to get his ass up from the swings and help.

And no, he was not _swinging_; he was sitting there because there was nowhere else to sit, considering that Ichigo pretty much damaged the park's benches and anything else within a 100 meter radius beyond repair.

The shinigamis would just fix them up later, so it wasn't his or even the teen's concern, though _shorty_ did sometimes stop by to give the berry an earful whenever he had gone overboard, and while that amused Grimmjow somewhat, he didn't appreciate the damn woman taking Ichigo's time away from him.

His time with Ichigo was already short as it was.

And Grimmjow knew this wasn't going to last forever, whatever _this_ was.

Grimmjow had to admit he had grown spiteful of Ichigo somewhere along the way, perhaps in the middle of their brief timeline of planned spars and late night visits. He didn't know why, but he just seemed to realize something one day, and for a while, things had gone nowhere but downhill for both of them.

As always, it was him who started it, and it made Ichigo scowl in a way that Grimmjow never saw before.

"So, you're going to simply leave?" the orange-haired teen asked with a twitch on his lips that Grimmjow could see was forced to be as inconspicuous as possible. Ichigo was irritated. Grimmjow had learned every facial expression, every small and typical habits of the teen that would have been lost to others but not to him.

The muscles around his shoulder and neck tightened, his own frustration twisting under the movement, and Grimmjow was sure that Ichigo saw through that very angry demeanor he wore to hide his internal struggle.

Grimmjow wasn't used to someone knowing him so much, so intimately, that he let out a growl Ichigo wanted to mistake for violent urges coming from the man, but he knew it was something else. And Grimmjow refused to tell him.

"Why should I stay?" The words cut through his throat as sharply as it did Ichigo's heart, and Grimmjow could hear the sound of something breaking from far away, somewhere deep and coming from his own hollow hole.

The hole wasn't located on his chest, or where his heart should lie, but it still held something important, a place where he had lost something, his soul maybe, but whatever it was, he had gotten that something back because of Ichigo.

And now, he was tearing it out again.

"There's a limit to how naïve you can be, _shinigami_," Grimmjow claimed. A weariness that wasn't quite there before now settled on his body, and it was heavy, too heavy. Grimmjow let out a sigh. "This is it. This is the limit. We're at war, and I'm going to fight you for real eventually." He turned to look at Ichigo, realizing that for the majority of this interaction, he hadn't once truly met the teen's eyes, afraid of losing his resolve to end the happiness that was going to die sooner or later anyway. He just chose sooner.

"Someone _is_ going to die." He let the words hang there for Ichigo to predict and prepare for what was coming next.

Wanting to close his eyes but knew he shouldn't, Grimmjow stared right into the brown orbs that had the ability to always straighten him out whenever he was stuck with a problem, whenever he had the tendency to kill, whenever Ichigo _wanted_ to.

And when the thought occurred to him, Grimmjow knew he had fallen hard. He also wasn't sure whether he could pick himself back up without leaving a piece or two behind.

"It sure as hell isn't going to be me."

Suddenly overcame by the idea of leaving before hearing the teen's voice, Grimmjow sharply turned his heels and faced the window. But it wasn't fast enough, because within seconds, Ichigo already knew what to say, even though Grimmjow was hoping he had left him in shock, or at least impeding anger, long enough for him speed off.

"Get out."

Ichigo's tone was smooth and calm. There was no crack in the words. It was resolute, and immediately Grimmjow leaving was not his own will anymore. From two simple words, it made Grimmjow's intention of a sonido seem out of place, like he was running away or commanded to do so, not because it was his choice.

He assumed it was the teen's aim, to rouse him, to nick at his pride. If he were to leave now, his pride would be shattered. Both Pantera and his instinct urged him to stay and fight it out with the teen, unable to take the insult.

Instead, Grimmjow gritted his teeth and jumped out the window without glancing back, all the while reasoning that he was going to teach Emotion and Feelings a lesson before anything else. One step at a time.

Grimmjow just couldn't bother to deal with the teen right now, not when he had himself to fight with first.

* * *

Ultimately, Grimmjow died.

Not in a physical sense of the word, no. He was in conflict with himself when he returned to Las Noches, and the ball of guilt that had been lodged somewhere deep in his brain was there to stay.

Eventually, it reached a point where Grimmjow wanted to kill everything in sight. This included himself whenever he saw the familiar shade of blue of his hair and eyes in any kind of reflective surfaces, colors that seemed to become duller and darker each passing day.

So, he attempted to kill the part of him that was still prodding him to go back to the human world, to Kurosaki Ichigo, to the half-human-half-shinigami that wouldn't leave his mind alone.

Grimmjow just _refused_ to think about the teen for a couple of days.

It couldn't be done without the help of Ulquiorra and Nnoitra, of course, so he would have to eventually thank them, though he knew they wouldn't appreciate such gestures given that he viewed them as recipients of (for Ulquiorra) his irksome remarks and (for Nnoitra) his fists.

And because he was brooding—not that he would ever admit that really—Grimmjow came back from annoying the two higher ranking espadas with more bruises, both mental and physical, than he had hoped.

This was _his_ version of alcohol. Because liquor was for the weak.

And it did make him forget, though. For a while.

This was up until he was sent back to the human world one day, Tosen finally coming up with something for him to do—that blind bastard—to go stir up trouble for the shinigamis situated there. Apparently that was all he was capable of in Tosen's eyes—ha!

He cracks himself up sometimes.

But, really, Grimmjow knew he was assigned this "mission" more to keep him busy than to kick around some low ranking shinigamis. The captains were all back in soul society now that they have more time to plan for an attack of their own instead of being on the defense all the time like before. And Aizen obviously wanted Grimmjow out of his hair as well since he had been doing nothing useful but causing ruckus everywhere he went.

This wasn't about them, though. It wasn't even about him.

It was always Ichigo.

Yet, Grimmjow continued to be pissed off about a certain situation he refused to acknowledge has anything to do with a certain substitute shinigami. It was getting on everyone's nerves. It was getting on _his_ nerves!

When he stepped out of the garganta, the sky was now a brilliant shade of dark blue and orange. With the day fading away and the night slowly seeping in through the seams, Grimmjow couldn't help but think about all the times he visited the teen, now that he found himself in front of the Kurosaki clinic.

They never got a chance to hang out during the day for obvious reasons, and Grimmjow himself wouldn't like the prospect of it either way, the sun being too hot for someone who lived under the cold moon of Las Noches every night and day, and the street being overcrowded by humans he never wished to make contact with, no matter how accidental.

Grimmjow approached his usual entrance with caution, a hesitation he never knew he possessed before freezing his movements briefly before he scoffed at himself and made a move to open the window.

He had expected it to be locked, a sign that he was deemed forever an uninvited guest, but the window was, oddly, not. In fact, it was even left open. Grimmjow found it encouraging, but the frown still marred his face. He was the one who walked out. And now he was coming back…really, just like a domesticated house cat.

That thought alone stopped him from stepping inside the room. His pride didn't allow him to be in such a state. What weakness. How upsetting. He was a panther, not a _cat_. He was free, not chained. That's what he was right now, wasn't it? Chained. Held back.

Grimmjow scowled. If he made a decision, then he should stick with it. No going back. Ever. He could never take back those words, after all. Doing so would not hurt only his pride, but the damned teen's as well. It wasn't fair to either of them. For Ichigo to forgive him so easily.

For Grimmjow to expect he would be able to come back and everything would be fine.

"Grimmjow?"

The voice shook him from his own mindless thoughts and mental conflict. He never knew that his resolve could be so shaken with just one word—no, his resolve was entirely _broken_ with just one word.

He wanted so badly to grind his teeth.

Grimmjow had been ready to leave when Ichigo's face greeted him. Not from inside the room, but outside the teen's home. And Grimmjow had to wonder how long Ichigo had been there.

He was quick to recompose himself and narrowed his eyes, the usual sneer back on his lips when he finally spoke. "Shinigami?" Grimmjow eyed the man without much interest. "You still alive, huh?"

At this, Ichigo answered back with a frown of his own, and it was different than the one he always wore, misplaced and filled with confusion. "Oh? I thought that should be my line?" His lips tugged down even further in an attempt to show the utmost displeasure. Ichigo hoped it would be passable because honestly, he was nothing but shocked at the moment. "Months of absence and now you show up, I thought I was going to have to set up a grave for you."

Grimmjow laughed. "I didn't know you care, shinigami."

Ichigo scoffed. "No one else will. Asshole that you are."

They were back in the same pace, arguing, mocking each other, and it was the closest they have been for a long time. Grimmjow couldn't help but smirked mentally at the flow of conversation, and Ichigo couldn't help but smiled in the same way at the never changing, arrogant man.

"I'm surprised Aizen didn't dispose of you the moment you went back." Ichigo appeared jaded. "Or at the very least cut off your arm. Again."

An eyebrow lifted up in both irritation and amusement. "As far as anyone knows, I haven't done anything caustic in the human world—."

"You using big words now?"

"Shut up and listen to me, why don't cha?"

Ichigo scowled. "All I hear is barking, so I don't know why I should stop talking."

"You…" Grimmjow's lips twitched in frustration. "You've gotten cheeky, haven't you?"

"I don't know, maybe," Ichigo shrugged. "Did you become more of an asshole?"

"Look, brat, I don't want to hear that coming from you."

Ichigo narrowed his eyes. "I wasn't the one who walked out, Grimmjow."

Suddenly the atmosphere seemed tenser, a heavy weight in the air settled down around the two and Grimmjow was sure this wasn't how he meant for it to go. In fact, they weren't even supposed to see each other again, not like this. They were only supposed to fight in the battlefield, nothing more, nothing less.

And then one of them would die.

Grimmjow watched the teen and took in the fury he saw in the brown eyes. His own rage at the teen's words dwindled down into ashes as he glared into the shinigami's soul. If he wasn't fooling himself, Grimmjow would think the only thing he saw was hurt and betrayal. Surely, Ichigo wouldn't be angry at him because of sorrow alone. It was selfish for him to think that.

Grimmjow wasn't the victim here. He never had been. But neither was Ichigo. Ichigo was too strong for the word. For Grimmjow to call the teen as such was disrespectful, and if Ichigo were ever a victim, Grimmjow would never have obsessively sought him out so much.

He would never have grown to love him so damn much.

Grimmjow blinked.

_Love_?

That was something…new. He hadn't considered that. Why did he use that word just now?

"Grimmjow."

The espada didn't pay any heed to the call. He barely even heard it. The only thing echoing in his head right now were questions and a strong feeling throbbing around his hollow hole. It wasn't entirely painful, but the feeling was resilient. He couldn't ignore it. It wasn't something that went away like a battle wound or became numb after a while due to blood loss. It slowly moved up to his chest, and it still throbbed in that non-painful way it did and Grimmjow didn't know what it was.

He didn't like it.

He didn't like that he didn't like it.

"Grimmjow!"

The teen's voice was loud now, a shout from far away, but when Grimmjow looked up, Ichigo was too close, closer than before. Grimmjow never noticed his gaze left the teen at all, but when he did, he also saw that Ichigo's expression changed. And it wasn't into something worse.

And so he had to ask.

"Shinigami."

Just like that, when Grimmjow's voice returned, Ichigo's scowl came back as well. "What?" A solid, sturdy response.

"You left the window open."

"Yeah?" There was a pause in between.

Grimmjow watched Ichigo, a steady gaze this time with a concentration that wouldn't be given to anything else, not even the reiatsu that seemed to be approaching them with concerning speed, not even when Ichigo finally realized that fact and tried to postpone the issue.

"Grimmjow, someone's coming—."

"Like I give a fuck."

"Grimmjow—."

"Why did you leave the window like that?" He continued without letting the teen's gripes bothering him. "You told me before. That you keep it locked all the time, even after the woman starts staying with you."

"What's with this?" Ichigo raised a confused eyebrow at the words.

"Were you expecting someone?"

"What? _No_."

"Then why you left it open?"

"I was out hunting hollows, if you haven't noticed," Ichigo answered briskly. "I must have forgotten about it. Besides, I _do _have to come back in when I'm done, you know."

Ichigo scoffed at the triviality of the question, but Grimmjow could hear a crack in the teen's usually more than confident tone. It made Grimmjow more eager to push on.

"_Bullshit_. You always told me to close the damn window as to not raise suspicion or some crap. Prude that you are, you wouldn't forget something like this."

"I—."

"How long have you been doing this?"

"Grimm—."

"You were waiting for someone. Don't you _dare_ lie."

At this point, Ichigo merely narrowed his eyes at the accusations and refused to say more. It wouldn't matter anyway. His words wouldn't convince Grimmjow otherwise, adamant that he was. And after all…

Ichigo wanted to sigh in frustration.

Silence, and Grimmjow continued because this was the end of their charade.

"That window was open for _me_."

…After all, what Grimmjow suspected was true. He had to applaud the espada's intuition, if that was intuition at all, really.

Eventually, Ichigo sighed out loud and clutched his head. For some reason, it hurt real badly.

His heart didn't anymore, though. Ichigo wanted to wonder why, even though he obviously knew the reason.

"Shinigami," Grimmjow said.

No answer, so he called out again.

"_Ichigo_."

It felt like a huge weight was lifted off his body immediately with just the teen's name alone. Grimmjow felt better. That was saying a lot, he supposed. After months of destroying parts of Las Noches and getting into fights with Ulquiorra and Nnoitra just to get his mind off the teen and end his violent grieving, saying the teen's name and feeling practically at ease seemed like an anticlimactic solution to his turmoil.

But he was fine with that.

"Grimmjow."

The espada smirked. "Yeah?"

Ichigo scowled at the cockiness radiating off the man.

"Get the hell inside before you wake the whole neighborhood up."

Grimmjow laughed. "I'm sure we're gonna wake them up anyway tonight—."

"IN!"

It shouldn't be this easy. Truly, happiness shouldn't be something that could be obtained so easily like this for a hollow who knew nothing but darkness all his life.

But it was.

* * *

A/N: I'm back :) and this trilogy is finally finished. I just need to upload the last chapter and we're done! And since I'm leaving for college soon, "The Present" Chapter-which was actually finished before "The Past" and I was just waiting to get off this writer's block and finish this chapter-is going to come sooner than you think. Happy Reading! and remember, R&R!


	3. The PRESENT

_**Life After You [A Trilogy] – The Present**_

* * *

_Believe me I won't stop at nothin'_

_To see you so I've started runnin'…_

_All that I'm after is a life full of laughter_

_Without you God knows what I'd do…_

* * *

His heart was pounding against his chest, practically rattling his ribcage. His face, however, remained stoic, calm. He couldn't let out his true feelings of seeing the teen there in Hueco Mundo. Grimmjow only kept his focus train on one thought.

_What the _fuck_ was the kid doing here?_

Curiosity. Confusion. Because that was the only thing in his mind that wouldn't involve him running forward to greet the teen and check over his wellbeing like the lover-in-denial he actually was.

Grimmjow knew that once the kid was here, there wasn't a snowflake's chance in hell he was going to leave without at least some kind of permanent injuries, psychological or physical ones, perhaps both. It would take a retard to still see the optimistic side of things the moment Aizen's eyes rested on the teen. There was nothing he could do. Grimmjow growled at himself mentally.

But there was everything he could _try_. Yet, he wasn't doing anything except standing there, letting Aizen approach Ichigo with a victorious glint in his eyes. That bastard had to get off his high horse, but there was just no one who could kick him off.

"What a surprise," Aizen said, smiling. "Although I must admit it is not the turn out I have hoped, I am not in protest of it. Tell me, Kurosaki Ichigo, why have you decided to approach me?"

"You know full well why I'm here, Aizen," Ichigo claimed.

Grimmjow raised an eyebrow at the teen's serious and knowing tone. _He does?_

Whatever it was, Aizen seemed to have acknowledged silently, merely nodding slightly to the teen's word, unwilling to share it with the rest of the crowd, even though Grimmjow wanted so badly to know what secrets lie behind the ex-shinigami's smile and Ichigo's deep frown.

"I understand, Ichigo, that you want something that I have," Aizen said, a gleam in his eyes. "But I have to wonder, what will you give in exchange for it?"

At this point, Ichigo's eyes wandered furtively to the side, to the location that Grimmjow was standing, and Grimmjow blinked accusingly at the teen, as if to say, "What the fuck do you think you're doing? Areyououtofyourfuckingmind?" before Ichigo quickly tore his gaze away. The message didn't reach the teen, or so Grimmjow hoped, because if Ichigo understood why his Espada lover was freaking out behind sheen of sweats and highly professional mask of indifference, then Ichigo was ignoring it.

And Grimmjow didn't like that.

"Would you rather we talk somewhere more private?" Aizen asked, appearing to have caught on and misunderstood Ichigo's wearied glances around the place for distrust. That, or the bastard was faking ignorance. Grimmjow hoped it was the former, but his doubts nagged at him that it was the latter. He was going to go crazy if the conversation continued.

"Yeah, sure."

And the teen dared to say yes. With Grimmjow there. Gaping at him before reeling his emotions back quickly the moment Tousen's blind eyes shifted towards him. For some reason, the man would still know of his hyperventilation despite the fact he couldn't see, and to Grimmjow, that didn't prove that the man was strong, that he was capable beyond all else. No. It proved that he was a freak.

Yeah, Grimmjow was placing blames and stupid insults on others.

Yeah, Grimmjow didn't care that he was.

And during the self-imposed inner conflict, Grimmjow found that Aizen and Ichigo had finished whatever conversation they were conducting in public and was ready to move their secrecy somewhere else.

Grimmjow heard Ichigo bite back a scoff, and it was all he could do not to sprint forward and punch the arrogant overlord right in the face when the man had the nerve to place a hand on the teen's shoulder. Granted, the action was nothing but a simple movement to guide Ichigo forward, devoid of any hint of sexual intentions, but Grimmjow didn't want the bastard to even _touch_ what he deemed as his, or rather, who Grimmjow deemed as important.

"Wait!"

The two men turned towards his direction, and that was when Grimmjow realized that the demand came from him.

Fuck his life.

"What is it, Grimmjow?" Aizen inquired, a tinge of impatience in his voice. Beside him, Ichigo looked utterly shock and apprehensive at the same time. Apparently, the teen had a plan, maybe several, and Grimmjow was ruining them one by one as words continued to float past his lips, having taken sentience and saying whatever they wish to say.

"Don't you think it would be fucking proper to keep things strictly on a business level?" He was sprouting shit. Even he acknowledged that. "I mean, what do you actually have to hide from your espadas that you can't say here? Are we chopped liver? Jeez, there has to be some sort rules against this sort of shit like child labor or human fucking indentured service or something. Fucking hell, am I the only one who have complaints about this crap?"

Grimmjow didn't expect anyone to be on his side, especially when his side was in the process of digging a deep hole of at least six feet underground for burial. But Grimmjow glanced around anyway for support, more to prove a point than anything else. Everybody's gazes were elsewhere. Hell, even Ulquiorra was closing his eyes to the event that was unfolding in the throne room, almost like he was offering a silent prayer to him and that in itself was so rare that Grimmjow actually felt nervous.

Silence was his only companion for hour-long seconds. It was a bad companion; however, Grimmjow would choose it over the blank look on Aizen's face any other day.

"Grimmjow," the overlord began, then pausing, as his sixth espada shoved his hands in his pockets along with the rest of his sanity, attempting to practice nonchalance after the outburst. "You didn't know about this," he stated.

And because he wasn't a pile of ashes on the ground yet, Grimmjow found the guts to reply back firmly. "Know about what?"

Aizen turned to Ichigo then, and Grimmjow's teal eyes followed to watch as the teen brought a hand up to rub the back of his neck, almost seeming sheepish about something.

"You weren't exactly supposed to know…" Ichigo said, hesitant.

Grimmjow's eyes narrowed. "Know about _what_?"

Ichigo heaved out a breath, closed his eyes, and braced himself, as Grimmjow became almost frozen by the next words that came out of the teen's mouth.

"I was asking for _you_."

* * *

"What. The. _FUCK_?"

"What the hell, Grimmjow?"

The shout that greeted him was not unfamiliar, and Grimmjow raised his head to see Ichigo glaring down at him upside down. No, that wasn't right. Grimmjow moved to stand, but a pang shot through his leg like lightning the moment he even tried to turn around. He grunted in pain and annoyance, mostly annoyance, before shaking his head and lifting himself up from the ground, bed sheets spread across the floor and ruffled up, like someone had been fighting with it a couple of minutes ago. Grimmjow refused to acknowledge it was him.

"Don't knock my stuff down over some stupid nightmares, Grimm," Ichigo exclaimed with a sigh. He combs a hand through orange matted hair in exasperation before picking up the lamp and books on the floor. "And of course, you _would_ nearly break my nightstand in your fit of rage or whatever it was you were dreaming about." A pause of consideration. "Huh," the teen let out an amused sound, "it just occurred to me that hollows dream."

In all of Ichigo's musings, Grimmjow didn't hear him at all. The Espada could only think back about the horrific and strange whatever-the-fuck-that-was that still hung in the back of his mind like a slide show, playing over and over again until it threatened to give him some kind of internal bleeding in the back of his eyes.

"What was it about anyway?" Grimmjow heard Ichigo asking, and it took him quite a large amount of effort not to burst out into hysterical and disturbed laughter when he saw the teen's curious face.

"Nothing," Grimmjow settled. "Nothing at all." _Just _you_ fucking _proposing_ to _me_…_

And to save his own life and let his sanity rest and revitalize, Grimmjow decided to steer the subject very far, far away from what he had just witnessed during his sleep. He wasn't going to talk about it. He wasn't going to even acknowledge it any more than he already had. In fact, it was all just going to disappear if he left it alone for a few minutes more. At least that's what he was hoping for.

To Ichigo's credit, the teen was smart enough to leave the subject be, probably catching some sort of dark humor in Grimmjow's eyes that he didn't wish to approach. Ichigo settled instead for the alternative. "So, tired these days, huh?"

Grimmjow was more than grateful for that and quickly got off the floor as gracefully as he could, propping himself on the bed like how he usually do whenever he visited the teen.

"Yeah," he said, scratching his head. "You can say that. Aizen," and Grimmjow had to pause at this when a particular piece of the stupid dream flashed by his eyes, "_Aizen_ is working us like slaves."

"I thought that's what you guys are."

A glare was immediately sent in Ichigo's way. "Funny. If I weren't after your ass, I would be after your life."

Grimmjow saw a faint tint of red settling on Ichigo's cheeks before the teen brushed it away with a well-placed cough and a wave of hand.

"So, to what do I owe the honor of this visit from Jaegarjaques-sama?" Ichigo asked, sarcasm flying everywhere the room like fireworks. Grimmjow frowned, but didn't push it. He was still trying to forcefully repress whatever was left of that…_that_.

"You don't have to be prissy about it," he commented. "I came 'cause I was bored. Like always."

"Didn't come because you miss me?"

He was in shock. "What?"

Obviously, Ichigo wasn't going to be as bold the next time he spoke. "I said, 'because you didn't come, you missed something fun.'"

"Bullshit." Grimmjow pressed on, even though the teen was very clearly trying to smack himself in the head in regret for the words he said. "You think I'm deaf? Wasn't it, 'Didn't you come because you wanted to kiss me'?"

"Whoah, no, I said 'miss,'" Ichigo countered in surprise. When Grimmjow raised an eyebrow, the teen brows furrowed and he narrowed his eyes. "It was '_MISS'_."

Feeling like this idiotic argument was capable of being dragged on for at least ten more minutes or so, Grimmjow decided to end it with a roll of his eyes and a shrug of his shoulders. "Whatever, shinigami. Now, on to the main event..."

Really, he did came to the living world to see the kid out of sexual frustration and a longing he couldn't exactly place, but Grimmjow wasn't about to admit anything to Ichigo. It was his rights. And it was going to be his mortification if he let his newly found emotions get to him. This was why Ulquiorra warned him, in a weird creepy way of his, to take it easy.

Well, Grimmjow wasn't specifically quoting the uptight Cuatro—in fact, Ulquiorra basically called him trash and walked away to visit the woman after a couple of insults were thrown around, and really, Grimmjow still couldn't believe he caught the bitch looking back at him and say to "sort his fucking life out if he was going to try anything."

Grimmjow assumed that Ulquiorra knew and was talking about Ichigo, since the man had grew a heart approximately two weeks before him and was now all lovey-dovey with someone who he was supposed to keep an eye on (as lovey-dovey as the Cuatro could actually get). If not, then hell if he knew what Ulquiorra was referring to.

"Grimmjow," Ichigo muttered in warning when the teal-haired espada approached him with an intention that didn't quite appeal to him at this time. "I have a paper to finish."

"Do it later." Grimmjow only paused to voice his opinion before moving on, grabbing the teen's shirt and attempting to drag him towards the bed. If the kid resisted any further, Grimmjow was going to fuck courtesy and throw the damn teen on it.

"Look, can't we be normal for once?" Ichigo sighed, but allowed himself to be pull from his desk anyway. He landed on the bed with a small grunt, Grimmjow not far behind, and his eyes traced the rumpled lines of the fabric that Grimmjow made before.

"Define 'normal'."

Lips landed on Ichigo's neck and hands locked with his own, and Ichigo was really finding it hard to continue his thinking process, but there was something he had to say before he was lost in oblivion as always.

"Well, I can't help but wonder," Ichigo said, "You think _I'm_ gonna be able to live normally?"

"Again, you are not clarifying the word." Grimmjow muttered, irritated, but suddenly interested in Ichigo's reasoning more than what he was doing. Seriously, Grimmjow was _really _finding it hard to refrain himself though, what with the teen lying on the sheets like that with a pinkish layer on his skin and a hazy look in his eyes. However, there was something intense there in those brown orbs, too, if Grimmjow watched closely, and it was bothering him. He paused.

"So, all this is _ab_normal, eh?" Grimmjow reasoned, pointedly flicking his wrist around the room for the teen to see, including the thin area between them.

"NO. No," Ichigo groaned. "Just…" He paused, considering the thought, like he knew Grimmjow was going to laugh at it and was weighing to see if it was worth sharing at all.

"I want to go to college, you know," Ichigo finally muttered out.

For a moment, there was silence. Then Grimmjow raised his eyebrow and let out a confused sound, questioning him for further explanation. The Espada didn't like being unable to keep up.

Grimmjow's lack of knowledge was probably the only reason why there was no mocking, hysterical laughter yet. "Alright," said Grimmjow, exasperated. "_What_ is that and _where_ did that come from?"

"You know school?"

"Yes, I fucking know what a school is," Grimmjow huffed, clearly insulted by the teen's tone. "But in the middle of _this_?" He gestured towards the proximity of their bodies with a huff.

"Well, College. We go there for more education…to get smarter…" Ichigo mumbled, ignoring Grimmjow's subsequent pout. "A lot of people go there so that they can live the life they want. My old man. He's able to open the clinic downstairs because of college." A pause. "At least I hope…or else that's going to be problematic. If his license's not even real, oh man…" Ichigo pondered, and then took one look at Grimmjow's unimpressed face before deciding to give up. "God, this is like teaching a child."

"What was that, shinigami?"

"Nothin' really."

Grimmjow wasn't going to let it go. "Fuck yeah that was something. You start off trying to give me a lesson, digress half-way, and then look at me like I'm stupid? Are you trying to pick a fight?"

"No! Jeez, just chill!" Ichigo shouted. Grimmjow wasn't about to calm down, already standing up from his temporary sleeping spot on the teen's bed, ready to pull out his sword.

Ichigo cut him off.

"I was just having this crazy thought, that's all," the orange-haired teen explained quickly. "What it would be like…if you would go to some place normal like that with me."

Hearing that, Grimmjow practically froze, more from confusion than anything, perhaps a bit curious, too, as was his nature.

Ichigo continued on. "No fighting, just…average stuff."

Just that word alone should have made Grimmjow cringe and scowl with all his might, his skin prickling at the thought of the intense boredom he would have to face day after day. _Average_… He couldn't live like that. As much as he wanted to deny Ichigo's claim of him being an "overgrown cat," it was true to a degree, and Grimmjow, like the feline Adjucas he had been before, hated being fenced in. He needed his freedom, his space…

Grimmjow looked over to Ichigo, and the teen stared back at him with a serious look on his face before turning, dropping his head onto the pillow with a small slump in his shoulders and a sigh. He had given up on his persuasion, it seemed.

But Grimmjow, despite his frustration, knew that Ichigo never gave up on him. The teen could bitch, complain, and gripe all he wanted, but in the end, he would merely scoff and take whatever shit Grimmjow threw at him—though not always kindly, and Grimmjow wouldn't have it any other way.

He pondered.

Honestly, there was no way his life could be boring enough for him to kill himself as long as Ichigo was with him. If he weren't allowed to go on a killing spree, then he would just attack the teen. If he weren't supposed to use violence on humans, then he would just take it out on the shinigamis. Ichigo wouldn't appreciate that, but Grimmjow thought that it would be somewhat more tolerable.

Still watching Ichigo, watching his chest rise up and fall down in a smooth, deliberating motion, Grimmjow couldn't help but think that he wouldn't really mind. After all—and as he thought this, he grinned—he had his punching bag right here. His victim, his sparring partner, his lov—_Ichigo_, his Ichigo, right here…

"Oi."

When silence greeted him, Grimmjow furrowed his brow and moved to go lay down on the bed right on top of the teen. "OI!"

"Jeez, what!" Ichigo pushed Grimmjow's face away from his ear, scrunching up his face as he checked his hearing. The shout still left a ringing in his head, and Ichigo growled at the blue-haired man, his eyes dangerous.

"I can try."

"What?"

Grimmjow tsked. "I said I'll try."

Seeing the confusion on Ichigo's face, Grimmjow groaned and gripped the back of the teen's neck, pushing their lips together in exasperation. Once parted, Grimmjow had Ichigo's familiar scowl on his own face, nose twitching the smallest amount to mark his slight vexation.

"I'll stay, ok?" muttered Grimmjow. "It's not like I have anywhere else to go…Don't think I'm going to that _college_ place though. Sounds like a hassle."

Ichigo, after a pause, snickered. He never expected Grimmjow to comply, or at the very least, seeming to comply. The man never liked discussing things like this and it perked Ichigo's amusement to see his attempt of a peaceful conversation, one that wouldn't blow up into an argument or a fight. It was invigorating, surprisingly, to see this side of the hollow that vowed he would never change. Or maybe Grimmjow had always carried this part of him inside. Whatever it was, Ichigo was glad.

"Okay," said Ichigo.

"That's it?" The blue-haired man bristled. The reaction was too simple, and Grimmjow grew upset at the one-word answer the teen gave him. "I said all that, and "okay" is what I get?"

Ichigo's eyes were practically smiling.

"Yea," Ichigo said with a grin. His lips then slowly crooked to form something more devious. "If you want something _more_, you're going to have to do better than that."

Grimmjow let out an incredulous half-scoff-half-laugh that Ichigo could only described as shock and amusement.

"Ho~ Time really has changed," Grimmjow mused. "The uptight shinigami is actually manipulating me for sex…"

Ichigo blushed, scowling immediately. "Don't flatter yourself."

"I didn't." A feral grin flashed through the hollow's lips. "_You_ did. Gotta say, Kurosaki, I really don't mind."

"Shut. Up."

"Make me."

And Grimmjow made his move.

It was _so_ on.

Just like before and definitely would be after.

* * *

A/N: End guys, end :) I will try to catch up on Mistaken or work on a new one shot if I have time now that my classes started. Doubt it, but please bear with me, and if you have any ideas, hit me up on pm ;)


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